Whitney, Kylie and Neapolitan Ice cream.

I admit it. I am just a little bit of a grub, and unapologetically so. I like reading porn, erotica and romance! I am a total book geek. Naked photos, boytoons with big cocks and yes I do have a copy of Dorm Porn. I like it and it’s cool because sex and sensuality, in all its myrriad forms, are beautiful. Not to mention healthy!

Recent ebook reading has been ok. There has been the odd moment of brilliance but several seem to be suffering from some seriously vanilla sex. The good old insert tab A into slot B… fade to the fireplace shot and a whisper of Whitney and how she’ll always love you can be heard faintly in the background. I’m often left feeling like I’ve just watched an episode of The Red Shoe Diaries-porn minus the cock. That crescendo of mutual orgasms and happily ever afters. meh.

See, they should be thinking more along the lines of Kylie and her song Slow. Whitney smacks of a missish mindset whereas Kylie and Slow are just a bit less worried about decorum Slow down and dance with me, Yeah, slow…(and don’t tell me you wouldn’t want to be Kylie lying about with all those men! See here.)
There should be celebration of the male body in ALL its glory and I come away feeling a bit dissatisfied with the book if it does not do that. The sex should flow naturally within the story and not be some perfunctory fuck at the end. Some tension and toe curling moments that fit within the narrative might be nice. I understand that some authors have more erotic story lines and content, I get that. But even though I am reading a whole crap load of books at the moment the sex is often the same, and tedious. Would it be of benefit to visit banana boys or sticky pen perhaps?

There is a definite difference, obviously, between porn and something more romantic. When I read porn, it’s porn, erotic and luscious usually minus the romantic entanglements. When I read something that is aimed at a more romantic audience I want to feel that connection between the characters but I also want the sex to be good. Remember, they’re boys and boys can be dirty, which I love. Sex is not clean, it’s dirty, sweaty and hot. Frequently, I am sure there is a certain hesitancy in authors to explore all facets of sexuality in a m/m book. Yes, I know you have a word count and you cannot perform sexual gymnastics all though the story, there does need to be a plot after all. But come on!!

There are some authors who I think that get it right. I am trying to to sound like a rabid fanghirl but JL Langley is one. There is that bit in With Caution-
– Jake pushes Remi against the wall and sinks to his knees and unzips his fly… and then a bit later says, “Be still, pup, and don’t come.” (hot damn)

Or in My Fair Captain-
– Aiden is hiding behind the curtain watching Nate jerk off. (damn hot)



Jet Mykles in Purgatory-
– Luc comes back to the house and Reese is horny and wants Luc to hurry-
Luc – ...teeth nipped his butt cheek. “I’m getting there.” (dayum!)

I could go on! There are other authors who write beautiful sex in their novels, but I am afraid not everyone does. As this is important part of my why I purchase a book, maybe I need to start being a little more frugal and wait for more reviews. There is nothing worse than feeling like I’ve just wasted up to $7.00 US (appx $11.00 NZ) on Whitney, when what I really want is Kylie and some Slow heat, passion, feeling, romance and well written sex. Less vanilla and more neapolitan please!

Photography is all Joe Oppedisano. Hot are they not?


20 thoughts on “Whitney, Kylie and Neapolitan Ice cream.

Add yours

  1. OMG, I love this post! You are so right! While I mix it up a lot reading m/f, f/f, m/m, what you are saying applies to all. I read so much erotic romance and erotica and I don’t know if it’s that I’m totally saturated with sex at this point, but it’s all become so ho-hum. If I’m reading erotica or erotic romance and I’m not getting turned on, then something sucks.

    I think many authors don’t get what passion and intensity is really. Because I’ve read some vanilla sex that has burned the pages up and some non-vanilla that put me right to sleep. So I don’t know exactly what that quality is, but some authors just “get it.”

    Cool post, really!

  2. I hear ya! I think the building of tension so your hanging on the edge of your seat is a skill. Doesn’t always have to be graphic, but variety would be nice.

    God, I have read some duds lately!!! Not to mention I am quite sure there are many characters who need donut cushions.

  3. Yes. Yes. Yes.

    I love you, Sarah. Will you marry me?

    I get sooooo easily burned out on m/m. I think a lot of authors have gotten the idea that readers want the same thing they’d enjoy in a m/f story, only with two dicks. That may be what some readers want, but it’s just not the case for me.

    You’re right…JL and Jet are among the very few m/m authors that actually *get* it.

  4. Funny, I just responded to Wave’s poll and mentioned the masturbation scene in MFC.

    Sometimes it’s the little things that just make you go Phew!

    The masturbation scene in MFC.

    In A Strong and Sudden Thaw when David says “Please” and then Callan says – “You know please is the most erotic word in the english language.” paraphrasing because I haven’t got the book to hand. And they aren’t even talking about sex, but suddenly there’s this whole emotional and sexual subtext going on that’s incredibly erotic.

    In Kushiel’s Dart when Alcuin takes off his shirt – that’s still one of the most erotic scenes I’ve read and he just takes off his shirt.

  5. hehehe. Jen, as long as you don’t mind the current spouse, maybe some cabana boys and the bloke looking in the mirror at the top and a certain comic book illustrator – sweet as. O-O. Polygamists are us Inc.

    It just gets my goat, it really does not to mention the cost. Makes me less inclined to take a chance on an author to be honest. Maybe I am just dirty, it has been mentioned to me before that perhaps I am. heh.

  6. Hi Lesley, god. I was up till late last night thinking about this. The masturbation scene is totally voyeuristic for you as the reader to because you know that Nate knows Aiden is there. It is so clever on so many levels. Not to mention so hot!

    When an author does get it right, those are the ones you go back and re read. It is such an incredible feeling – total butterflies in the tummy feeling! Those are also the authors that I am automatically inclined to buy also.

    I think the plot of the story is also incredibly important, obviously. I don’t mean I want more porn in my books – if I want that I’ll ferret off to sticky pen or the bedside table draw. snort. I want a strong plot, believable and worthy conflict and passion.

    I totally get the whole shirt off thing too Lesley, there are some parts of Josh Lanyon’s writing that just sing and yet they’re not explicit.

  7. For me there has to be some sort of connection between the characters for the sex to be hot–even in porn, I need to actually LIKE the people getting laid. And you’re right–the tab A/slot B thing needs to go–ESPECIALLY in menage. I recently finished a book which had sex in it, but because of the genre, I kept the scenes fairly non-explicit. The thing was, I had to actually go back and WRITE the explicit scene because I needed to know what went on between the characters in bed. (for people on the yahoo group, both versions are in the files) There are things lovers say to each other and ways lovers treat each other when their clothes are off that can not be duplicated, hinted at or glossed over. For a couple of the scenes, I went back and rewrote the scene based on criticism generated by the more explicit scene–the emotions weren’t coming through. And for me, that’s where the hotness comes from. Some of the hottest things I’ve ever read don’t even use the big/bad sex words–you know what they’re doing but you don’t need an anatomy lesson to follow along.

  8. Hey Amy 🙂 I think that you need to have a connection between characters too. For me reading porn and reading something more romantic is a bit different but there still has to be a connection, even if it is something basic like animal attraction.

  9. You are so right, Sarah. There’s only so many Tab As and Slot Bs on the human body, so in order for an author to keep the reader’s attention, she has to make it clear that her characters’ Tab As and Slot Bs have a unique fit because her characters are themselves unique. Samantha Kane does this beautifully. Even though there are only so many permutations for a M/M/F menage, I always feel like her erotic scenes are unique to those three particular characters.

    And speaking of Samantha Kane, she has an example of a scene that is only a kiss (Jason and Tony in his office), but it contains the fervor and passion that had me gasping for breath; whereas there are other authors that can write graphic erotic scenes that have me reading with no more interest than I’d place on ANY kind of action scene.

  10. See in m/m, I worry about B. I do! Sometimes it is almost like an author has a list, characters must do a, b, c and d and end with … It just gets to me!

    Sam Kane is cool, I like her books!

  11. Sara,

    Such a great post! I know Wave as a similar posting on her blog but this is such a great topic that I want to add my 2 cents and some change to this subject.

    Since Im a newbie to the genre, I havent read my fair share of M/M books to make a honest assessment. But I have read romance in various incarnations: m/m, m/f, and f/f so I feel I can tell my opinion on it.

    Here is the thing, what drove me to the M/M romance genre is I wasnt getting the HOT, DIRTY, SWEATY SEX that as a gay man I was getting but not reading even your typical gay fiction genre. I dont know if bc im a romantic at heart or bc Im a Cancer, but I have found that the best sexual experiences of my life is when I gained a connection with my partner via love, trust, and friendship. I think the main problem with a lot of writers is that they dont get what true passion and intensity is or cant convey it in their writing.
    Eroticism is a very complex thing bc sometimes the simplest act can rock the Reichter scales just as much as actual intercourse. Let me give 2 examples in two different movies. One of my favorite kisses in movies occurred in The Last of the Mohicans where the Daniel Day Louis and Madeline Stowe characters FINALLY kissed. I remember being on the edge of my seat in the movie theatre near panting and breathless. The reason is because of the sexual tension that was building to get to that point. No nudity, no actual intercourse but u could have heard a feather drop in that movie theatre bc EVERYONE has the same reaction. Now take a movie like 9 and 1/2 Weeks with Mickey Rourke and Kim Basinger.. The public sex in the dark alley scene is also amazing HOT. What really made that scene is up till that point Kim Basinger’s characters was timid about sex but in that scene there were moments where she was in total bliss and actually being aggressive in the sex herself (which u rarely see a female character do). 2 vastly different scenes but they both are scalding HOT for as eroticism.

    What writers of either gender of M/M erotic romance needs to get is that these are 2 MEN after all. Very rarely is the sex all rose petals on the bed, candles, and the like if at all. I believe the sex should be down and dirty and sweaty and passionate (almost to the point of obsession where both characters can hardly keep their hands off each bc their sexual chemistry in the air feels like they are in a sauna even though they are not). The romance should be sweet, heartbreaking, and enthralling bc believe or not and this may sound sexist: Men are truly one of the most romantic creatures.When men are in love, we are IN LOVE. Heartbreak to us is like something performing open heart surgery with no ether. The only thing is men (some and that is a significant number) dont know how to show it. All of this is what M/M authors should strive to obtain: Show eroticism without the sex. The sex should be HOT. The romance should be intense.

    The End.


  12. Woot! Ozakie, what great insights and I like what you said, especially the whole obsession thing.

    The Daniel Day Lewis film made me bawl, the young lovers dying thing really got to me. It was as bad as the English Patient! *sigh* Cannot remember much about 91/2 weeks but I do remember Sharon Stone and Michael Douglas and how they just looked at each other on the dance floor in Basic Instint http://tiny.cc/vZH6r
    Even better was Shelter, have you seen this movie yet? This clip is so gorgeous when they’re just lying their talking. Sigh… http://tiny.cc/b9jtn

  13. Sarah,

    Thank you so much for those clips. I have seen Basic Instinct and I do remember that scene, but I havent seen Shelter but that clip really wants me to see the movie all the more.

    Like I said, I just go into the M/M romance genre and I’m very behind in reading but I felt so strongly about this subject bc it needs to be talked about. I agree with Victor J. Banis in Josh Lanyon’s book Oh Man, Writing M/M Fiction (which is a bonafide classic if I do say so) that you dont have to sacrifice plot, character, or romance if you are going to write in this genre. Whether or not, the M/M romance book is paranormal, mystery/crime, historical, or temporary, the elements of plot, character, and romance should not be sacrificed or limited. If you put 100% in the plot, you need to put that much into the character and romance as well

  14. Sarah,

    By the way, I agree with you on The English Patient. Sigh. Such beautiful writing (the book) but the romance (book and movie) is simply exquisite.

  15. Sara,

    Absolutely LOVE this post—and your site! LOL! I’ve taken the time to do a bit of “catching up” here, and I have to say: “You’re very good at what you do.” 😉
    That being said, the very things you bring up here are the very things I work at incorporating in my own work ultimately–time will tell if I’m succeeding at it or not.



  16. Ozakie, here is a WICKED review by Paul – Gay Comic Geek on Shelter you must see. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whitAkpjed8

    He Sean! So cool to see you as it were. You’re such a sweetie to say so, I appreciate it. 😉 I do like my wee blog, crazy as it is! I think your work is srsly cool and I have enjoyed seeing Paul’s review. He is such a babe. :-p

  17. Sarah, you said it better then I have ever even tried to organize my thoughts. *lol* I really like Sean Micheal, Chris Owen and Drew Zachary in addition to all the ones you mentioned. *g*

    And now I have to go re-read With Caution thank you very much!


  18. Shit. Late to the party.

    I’ve been having some problems lately with m/m fiction and the lack of fully realized characters. Without that, it’s just all paper dolls. Also…TP and I have been sort of discussing this division between plot and character. All these elements need to work together. I have hope though because it’s a new genre! Not a lot of depth yet. I think the bar is being raised (daily) and as the newness wears off, it’s up to authors to try like hell to produce a better product to keep their fans interested and coming back for more.

    (And MFC rox my sox…such a surprise, I know)

  19. Oh LB, such a surprise you like MFC LOL, rly! I re read parts of it last night. What a fantastic book!

    And, I have to agree. I like the whole paper dolls thing, clever and apt. There have been a few where I have really enjoyed the premise – especially if it is sci fi or paranormal but the characters just don’t seem like men, well not any men I know. And, I like men! Now THERE is also a big surprise.

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